To say a final farewell to those we love is never easy.  During this raging pandemic where over 230,000 people have died, so many people, and some we may know intimately, have faced this sad moment.

Consuelo, a widow from Covid 19, comments that she just spent a tear-filled thirty-fifth wedding anniversary, experienced a difficult time enjoying her twin grandchildren's baptism, and finds it hard attending her younger brother’s wedding.

With a crumpled tissue in her hand, she related how bittersweet they felt because Felipe, the love of her life, was not there to share her joy and whirl her around the dance floor.

Death is difficult to face during a pandemic or anytime.  Like Consuelo, every death leaves a hole in our lives and family even when it is expected.  Yet, as we all soon realize, death is a fixed part of every life.

Karl Rahner, a Jesuit theologian, reminds us, “We live a dying life.”  And St. Francis de Sales urges his Salesian family to prepare for death often.  As sad as this may sound, he urges them to respond silently to hourly chimes with this phrase: We are approaching eternity. Promise O Lord to assist us now and at the hour of our death.

DeSales offers this suggestion knowing that death takes little pieces of us away, and often those little bits add up to a huge sense of loss.  De Sales is hoping this little reminder helps us all to do what our Father in heaven wants most from us – to love others more deeply – especially those close to us.

Rahner also adds, that our dead are: “…not absent but living near us transfigured… into love.”  And everyone caught by death needs to hear Jesus say: “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.”  And for those departed and now at peace: ‘‘Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of God.”

Our faith shows us is that our loved ones are truly in a better place, and soon we will be together again.  This is the reality of death.  While we feel the loss, it is a vast gain we need to believe deeply.

During November, we remember our loved ones, and pray especially for their eternal rest.  In turn, they remember us, and pray for us and any fears we have about our own death.  This itself is a great consolation.  Our easiest preparation for a happy death is to live each day well.

As St. Francis de Sales writes:

To die well, we must live well, for as our life is, so will be our death. We may still fear death, but to rely on the merits of the Lord's Passion will make us holy and tranquil.